December 2004 Archives

Albert Einstein's Theory of Relativity In Words of Four Letters or Less

Blogging remotely from my Treo650. I drove to Teaneck, NJ this morning to attend the wedding of my friends Abi & Josef. Even though this was my first Jewish orthodox wedding, I sort of knew what to expect from MIT's mock wedding in 2003.

I arrived right on time and met my good MIT friends at the door. The bride and groom started in different rooms. The men sang songs with Yosef for a half hour (I never knew "Siman tov, v'mazel tov" could be sung to so many tunes) before we danced him into the room with Abi. Their tearful meeting was probably the kodak-est moment of the afternoon.

We were then ushered into the synagogue for a traditional and fairly quick service. There were no speeches besides a brief D'var Torah (sermon). Yosef ended the ceremony with the breaking of the glass and we danced the newly-married couple into their private room.

The reception consisted mostly of eating and circular dancing (boys on one side, girls on the other). Each side attempted to entertain their respective host of honor: the women had a Mickey Mouse costume to pass around, we had a juggler on stilts.

Now I'm in NYC for the duration of 2004. If you're in New York and want to meet up, give me a call.

An Existentialist Sestina

Friday night the search for a permanent synagogue to attend continued at the Historic 6th & I St Shul. A plethora of Clinton pictures adorned the lower level, but these did not make the orthodox service more palatable. Since they split the men and the women (using a short barrier called a machitza) this was clearly not an option for a long-term community. I prefer women and men treated equally, thanks.

Went over to Sean and Nick's to play board games. I brought "The Perfect Ten," a cross between MasterMind a Trivial Pursuit, which was a birthday gift from my roomie. Friday was my first attempt at playing it, and while it was somewhat fun, the poorly shaded colors were quite the hindrance for my color-blind self. We moved on, with more success, to Turbo Cranium.

Saturday started at the Del Rey Dreamery where Jen (who is sadly leaving The Mellman Group), her boy Erich, Kim, and I exchanged presents and delighted in custard. Custard was followed by Fairfax Ice Arena public skate and Einstein Bro's bagels for lunch.

What made Saturday even better was watching the newly-released, extended version of RotK at Leslie's house. What a great movie. Wonderful scences featuring the Witch-King, Saruman, Faramir, Grima, Eomer/Eowyn, and the Mouth of Sauron were added to this edition. I made it two-thirds of the way through the movie before I had a single complaint: the houses of healing scenes leave book afficionados wanting. The HoH is one of the most memorable parts (at least for me) of Tolkien's RotK, and for the movie to brush right over it is a disappointment.

Had lunch Sunday with the family, including my brother, who is back from MIT (but sick with a fever). The afternoon included Philosopher's Club where the hostess and I (who were unfortunately the only two participants this week) discussed The Second Sex and a host of issues revolving around how much the scientific process is influenced by contemporary, popular metaphysical approaches (eg, postmodernism).

Sunday night I caught the tail end of the movie "40 Days and 40 Nights" on Comedy Central. The film seemed decent until the rape scene, which the producers (1) didn't acknowledge as rape, and (2) blamed the victim. Perhaps the filmmakers didn't want to accuse of woman of raping a man, but at least the majority of IMDB commenters agree with me.

Today, for the first time, I test drove a Segway! I was walking the halls of the Georgetown mall, looking for a present for my recommendation-writing boss, when I noticed a store with a lot of free space. Investigating further, I discovered that they were selling Segways and offering test rides for those that would sign wavers. Steering, which you accomplish by twisting the left handlebar, is quite fun and the Segway does respond to your slightest body movements. My conclusion: Dean Kamen's invention is the coolest, completely impractical devices I've ever seen.

And tonight I got the laundry machine card reader to accept a taped-up five dollar bill...ah, it's the little things in life.

Do Not Disturb sign is gone! That's a sure sign of major HP news :)

Brought my Moose Menorah to West Wing Wednesday. After a successful Chanukah lighting both last WWW and at the holiday party, I was eager for one more. What I didn't realize, and what the other Jewish person in our group pointed out, was that Chanukah ended Tuesday. Whoops. So we celebrated the "ninth" night of Chanukah instead (there are nine candles on the menorah anyway). Anticipating that people wanted to sing, which they did, I brought song sheets. We sang some rousing renditions of mi yimalel both in Hebrew and English. And The West Wing was halfway decent too.

Today I was slightly miffed about a non-bloggable issue, so I wanted to ice skate off some steam. I had also just recently re-discovered my skates in my closet and felt the need to test them out this winter. I tried to get to the Mt Vernon ice rink's free skate, but was waylaid by traffic in Old Town. I arrived two minutes after the public skate ended.

Not to be discouraged, I drove back north hoping that the Pentagon Row skating rink was open. (This rink wasn't my first choice due to its relatively small surface area.) Approaching, I noticed a few people standing near the opening to the rink, but I was unsure whether it was open.

"Hi," I said to the lady behind the counter, "do I have to pay if I have my own skates?"
"Uh...are you with Paychex?" was her reply.
"No."
"Then sorry, we're closed. We're open tomorrow until 11pm."
"Freakin' ridic--" I was thinking before young woman about my age chimed in. "Unless you want to be her date," she said half-chuckling, referring to another 20-something lacing up her rental skates.
"Hi, I'm Aaron," I say with hand extended (and quickly, in case she was joking).

And thus I was introduced to Dana, Paychex employee and invitee to their private office skate. She was a skating novice and clung to the rails. I attempted to give her some pointers and held her hand for balance at points, but after a few laps she grew tired of both skating and talking to a random nerd she had just met. This abandonment was no problem for me as there were several children around (upper management's kids). Both 7-yr-olds Brandon and Marilee went from rail-holding to skating in the open with relative ease by the evening's end. The kids were quick learners. I even successfully taught them to put their hands on their knees if they lose their balance. (Throwing their hands in the air could have caused them to lose balance and fall backwards, increasing the chances of a head injury.)

Came home and barely sat down when my cell phone rang. 'Twas Marcie inviting me for round two of bowling. I scored well: two 139's and a left-handed 99. (And for the second time in as many years, I walked outside with my bowling shoes on :~\ .)

A good night.

Saturday was a blast. First I drove to Baltimore to honor the matriarch of my father's side of the family, Sarah Belle Cullison, on the occasion of her 90th birthday. Sarah Belle isn't actually related to us, but she was my father's nanny and raised him and his two siblings. She still travels with our family: to Maine, Las Vegas, California, wherever. Unfortunately, Sarah Belle had no children of her own, but helped raise several children in her community (starting with her sister's daughter). About 200 people showed up, a testament to her active role in her neighborhood, something she continues to this day. Sarah Belle received citations from the city of Baltimore, the state of Maryland, and even President Bush.

My family (the two tables of Jewish white folk in the midst of protestant African Americans) honored Sarah Belle, as we are wont to do, with original poetry. My father read an acrostic poem, and each member of the family held up the a placard with the corresponding letter to spell out "Sarah Belle." My uncle played the harmonica and sang some blues. My aunt named a star after Sarah Bell in the constellation Sagittarius.

Saturday night was a West Wing crew Holiday Party. Over twenty people showed up to enjoy a white elephant gift swap, charades, and a game of dreidel. The hostesses made great food, and with everyone also bringing a dish (I made potato latkes, which went over well), I have a feeling that we'll be eating the leftovers on Wednesday. I finished the gift swap with Harry Potter stationary (!)--I donated half the gift (HP address book) to Justin, who really wanted the present as well but was stymied by the three-steal limit. The highlight of the evening though was my successful charade of "Flovilla Thatch Vs. The Virile Garbageman". Thank goodness there was no time limit--it took about 10 minutes. Left well past 1am--a great party by the West Wing hostesses.

Sunday I procrastinated and worked on my grad school essay. Three apps (Michigan, Columbia, Yale) go out via FedEx tomorrow.

Can you fool Google? Think of a phrase and type it into this page, which is Google's new as-you-type search (aka "Google Suggest"). If you complete the phrase without Google thinking of it first, you win.

I tried:
DC United
Shapley-Shubik (the power index)

before I stumped it with:
"You're not even literate" (A Strong Bad quote from one of my favorite emails.)

Google even guessed a few people's names that I entered: impressive.

The campaign is good and over with, so I'm pretty sure I can safely post the anonymous letter I wrote to the WP two months ago about this article. (I Cc'ed the Post's ombudsman as well.)

Dear Ms. Rosin,
I was disappointed to read in today's Washington Post Mrs. Kerry's and Mrs. Bush's disagreement described as a "girl-on-girl slap." I doubt that you would have labeled the Vice Presidential debate as a "boy-on-boy tussle." Your use of language has unfortunately perpetuated the gender stereotypes already pervasive in our society. I am hopeful that in the future you and your paper will be more careful with your words.

Sincerely,
Long-time Post reader

Perhaps I should have been harsher; especially after the empty paper bag incident.

Mother instructs 4th-grade daughter to sell Jell-O shots at school. Yet another indication that Vermont's offer to educate all new parents might be useful "in the several States."

Coworker JenL sent me this link. Scroll down to "Alexander"--definite magical cat potential.

Weekend was good. Saturday Chicklet stopped by on her east coast college tour. We went to Shabbat services, where unfortunately we didn't mingle with anyone. (Despite their being a bat mitzvah that weekend, there weren't many people our age.) Even the kids didn't want to talk to us.

Attempted to play mini-golf--failed. Attempted to connect my Treo to my Prius--failed. Attempted to play Scrabble, eat Chipotle, and have dessert at Cold Stone--succeeded. Saturday night I watched Prisoner of Azkaban, which my roommate just acquired.

Sunday started with a trip to my parents--I gave them computer help in exchange for some clothes. Then to Jen's where coworkers and sig oths had a tasty brunch (including challah-style french toast). Then we went to see the movie Sideways. I left the theatre depressed, as the film was an essay on human nature and humans don't always come off so well. Basically the movie was a grown-up version of Swingers. Also, the purpose of the entire 2-hour flick could be summarized by one scene from the movie Clerks. Other people in the group enjoyed Sideways, so judge for yourself.

Left coworkers to join the West Wing spin-off "philosophy book club." This week's book: The G-d Gene by Dean Hamer. I was the only one that read all the way through. Basically, Hamer says he found a gene that makes people more spiritual. First of all, this gene accounts for 1% of variance so it's hardly The G-d Gene. Second, the brain mechanism he presents for why the gene affects spirituality is unconvincing. I will acknowledge that Hamer proves that spirituality is hereditary. We had an interesting discussion; I tried my best not to dominate it.

From the book club I headed downtown to a Chanukah bash. I met two nice people whom I'm bowling with tonight. Unfortunately, there were no dreidels at the party. Lots of booze, but no dreidels...sigh, I liked the kids version better.

Monday I worked on grad school apps. My GRE scores have been sent (thankfully they were good enough so I don't have to retake them), and all my letters of rec are in progress. My personal statement is a bit lacking at the moment though.

Oh! And my Treo now mysteriously links to the Prius at non-deterministic points of time. It's disturbing and frustrating; I can only hope for a patch soon.

Some of you may remember my first cell phone, the Treo 600. After a mishap on the Metro I bought a $17 EBay phone as a replacement. The phone served me well, but it was time to move on....to the Treo 650! Email, bluetooth (ie, wireless communication with the D4t4Mobile), palm software (including directory assistance), SMS, and AIM are all neatly packaged into a phone that fits (mostly) in the palm of my hand.

Today's WP had a front-page story on personalizing ring tones, which, coincidentally, I've been actively engaging in for the past two days. A person mentioned in the article had to pay $2 per tone--not so with my new Treo. I can play any midi file, and the Internet offers thousands (millions?) for free. Thus, if you want a personalized ringtone when you call, find an appropriate midi and email it to me. I've already assigned "Harry Potter" to Chicklet, "X-Files" to Seth, and "Deep In The Heart Of Texas" to Rachel.

Grad school application status: all recommendations in the field, still waiting for GRE writing scores.